Season's end

Golf season is winding down. The PGA players are chasing "The Tiger" for nuero uno.
Club tournaments and city tournaments have been played. Lots of golfers seem to put away their clubs after Labor Day and school starts. This is really a shame because some of the best golfing weather is in September. This year out late summer weather in Nebraska has been the best. Temperatures have been great and we have not had a lot of windy days either. The rains have come at good times and the courses are as pretty and green as spring. One of the downsides of fall golf is the falling leaves. Our course has mostly evergreen trees so the leaves are minimal. The baby geese have grown up and flew away a couple of months ago. Even though they are fun to watch, it's nice not to have the poopy mess they leave.

This is the time of year clubs have some "fun" tournaments trying to generate a little more fall interest. This Sunday our course is having a "one-person scramble". Each player gets to hit 2 balls on every shot. If you have a good shot with the first ball, you don't have to hit the second. A lot of clubs have a final 4 person scramble in mid October. A second reason for this tournament is to get the inventory in the coolers down. Especially if the clubhouse is not used during the winter months.

If you are thinking of buying new clubs, this might be a good time to shop. This years models will be replaced with new ones next spring so just like the automotive industries, they have year end clearances.

I hope all you golfers had a fun season and remember a bad day of golf is a better than a good day of work anytime.

For you non golfers, you don't know what your are missing.

Solheim

This weekend the LPGA's equivalent to the PGA's Ryder cup, the Solheim Cup, was played near Chicago. For those of you who do not golf the format has nothing to do with your final total. It is called "match play". The golfers compete hole by hole. If they get to the 14th hole and have won 5 holes the match is over. Winning 5 up with 4 to go. During the Solheim and Ryder competition they play 3 different formats. Four-ball, alternate shot and singles. Four-ball has 2 players from each team. If one play has less than the others that person or team wins the hole. The alternate- shot is really the hardest format. One player tees off and they alternate hitting the shot until the ball is holed out. If there is a low score that team wins the hole. Singles is head to head competition between 2 players. There are 14 players from America and 14 players from Europe. If the team ends up even at the end of 18 holes each team gets 1/2 point.

The first 2 days match 8 players (2 teams) from each team for 4-ball play in the morning and 8 players (2 teams) from each team for alternate stroke in the afternoon. On Sunday there are 14 matches of head to head competition.

After the first 2 days of competition the score was all tied at 8 wins each. If you think golf can't be exciting, you should watch the Ryder and Solheim cup competition. There are so many ups and downs and ties that it can really keep you on the edge of your seat. Although the US won 16 to 12 it really wasn't a run away on Sunday. The leads changed so many times it was hard to keep track. A lot of the matches came down to the last hole.

These matches were televised on the Golf channel. So if you don't get that tier of channels, you probably didn't even know this was going on. I have not seen even highlights on any other channel. Granted, I don't watch every news or morning show, but shouldn't the LPGA get as much attention as the PGA? The Solheim and the Ryder competitions are only played every other year. This year was the Solheim and next year the Ryder. Playing one year in the US the next in Europe. The US has never lost a Solheim match on US soil. USA, USA, USA!!!!!!!! You go girls.

Fun stuff

Since I don't want to bore you with all the tournaments that go on this time of year, I will steal something sent to my e-mail.

Although this isn't related to golf, one of the dumbest phone calls that came into the bank where I worked many moons ago was a lady that asked if all her checks were in. Like the bank was supposed to know how many she had written.

How about you? Any dumb or funny phone calls?

Subject: ACTUAL GOLF COURSE PHONE CALLS ACTUAL CALLS RECEIVED AT THE PUBLIC GOLF COURSE (Amherst, Mass.)
Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: What are your green fees? Staff: 38 dollars. Caller: Does that include golf?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: Yes, I need to get some information from you. First, is this your correct phone number?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: Yes, we have a tee time for two weeks from Friday. What's the weather going to be like that day?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: Yes, I had a tee time for this afternoon but I'm running late. Can you still get me out early?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: Yes, do you have one of those areas where you can buy a bucket of golf balls and hit them for practice? Staff: You mean a driving range? Caller: No, that's not it..,,,

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: Yes, I'd like to get a tee time tomorrow between 12 o'clock and noon. Staff: Between 12 o'clock and noon? Caller: Yes. Staff: We'll try to squeeze you in.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: Do you have any open tee times around 10 o'clock? Staff: Yes, we have one at 10:15. Caller: What's the next time after that? Staff: We have one at 10:22. Caller: We'll take that one. It will be a bit warmer.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: How much to play golf today? Staff: 25 to walk, 38 with a cart. Caller: 38 dollars? Staff: No, 38 yen.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: What do you have for tee times tomorrow? Staff: What time would you like? Caller: What times do you have? Staff: What time of the day? Caller: Any time. Staff: Morning or afternoon? Caller: Whenever. Staff: We have 16 times open in the morning and 20 open in the afternoon. Would you like me to read the whole list? Caller: No, I don't think any of those times will work for me.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: Do you have a dress code? Staff: Yes, we do. We require soft spikes. Caller: How about clothes? Staff: Yes, you have to wear clothes.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: Yes, do you have a driving range there? Staff: Yes. Caller: How much for a bucket of large balls? Staff: Sorry, we're all out of large balls. But we can give you twice as many small balls for the same price.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: Can I get a tee time for tomorrow? Staff: Sure, what time would you like? Caller: Something between 9 o'clock and 10 o'clock. In the morning, if possible.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: Do you rent golf clubs there? Staff: Yes, they're 25 dollars. Caller: How much to rent a bag?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: Yes, my husband just called me on his cell phone and told me he's on the 15th hole. How many more holes does he have to play before he gets to the 18th?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: Yes, do you have a driving range there? Staff: Yes. Caller: How much for a large bucket? Staff: Four dollars. Caller: Does that include the balls?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: Do you have a twilight rate? Staff: Yes, it's 15 dollars after 2 o'clock. Caller: And what time does that start?

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: Yes, I'd like some info about your golf course. Staff: OK, what would you like to know? Caller: I don't know, that's why I called.

Staff: Golf course, may I help you? Caller: My kids just came home with pockets full of range balls and said they stole them from your driving range. Would you like to buy them back?

5/29/09

I didn't report my .6 gain last week. Had a real busy weekend.

I lost 1.8 this week.

Abby's softball and Jacob's baseball have started so something else to do for the next month or so. Abby had her wisdom teeth pulled about 3 weeks ago and developed a surgical infection so couldn't play this week. She had a dentist appointment today and hopes to be able to play next week.

Jerry, Joe and Jake are getting Jerry's semi ready for a truck show tomorrow. I helped some today. Kind of hard to get it all shined up when it has to be on the road.

Joe has been hauling cattle for a company out of Wayne. He had a little mishap with a cow kicking him in the hand. It broke the bone on the outside. He seems to be getting along ok with it in a cast.

I had a nice lunch with Janell, Randy and Mick last Saturday. Memorial weekend is a good time to visit our hometowns. We ran into a lot of old friends.

Trees

A writer's blog on Pistols and Petticoats about hanging trees got me to thinking about trees.

The maple trees on our street are dropping their seeds. This means I will be pulling trees out of my flower beds the rest of the summer. If they would be left to grow my house would be in the middle of a forest.

The cottonwood trees in the park in Lyons are real giants. They are probably the same ones our mother played around when she was a little girl. The big tree that grew through the sidewalk on the corner by the bank is gone. In the summer time it seemed like there were always some men sitting on the bench attached to the tree. Probably solving all the world's problems. Well maybe just the town's problems.

Grandma's cherry tree also springs to mind. Picking her cherries every summer was not one of the things I looked forward to. Those cherries seemed to be too sour for me and there didn't seem to be enough sugar to made them sweet even in a pie. In the fall there were black walnuts. Even though there was a lot of work to getting the hulls off, breaking their hard shells, and digging out the meat, they are the best nuts for brownies. Squirrels must have very strong jaws to be able to crack those shells.

Mulberry trees, yum. Eating the fruit right off the tree would turn our hands and lips purple, but oh my they tasted good. There are a few trees on our golf course that I like to nibble off of when I pass by them.

Driving through Missouri and Arkansas one October was one of the most beautiful drives I have ever taken. The trees were every color you could imagine. Another October we drove to California and back. The prettiest trees on that trip were the ones along the Platte River in Nebraska.

On a train trip to Biloxi, Mississippi when I was a teenager what I remember most was riding for long stretches through really tall trees. I don't know what kind they were, but they seemed to go on forever.

There are two trees in back of our house. I think the big maple belongs to the neighbor, but it is on the lot line so I'm not sure. It certainly provides a lot of shade. The other is one that flowers pink every spring. If you go back a few blogs there is a picture of it.

Isn't it amazing when you think about how deep the roots of some of those big trees have to go to be able to keep them from falling over in the wind? Those roots are not deterred by sidewalks. They just push them up and keep right on growing.

I think that I shall never see
a poem as lovely as a tree

A tree whose hungry mouth is prest
against the earth's sweet flowing breast

A tree that looks to God all day
and lifts its leafy arms to pray

A tree thay may in summer wear
a nest of Robins in her hair

Upon whose bosom snow has lain
who intimately lives with rain

Poems are made by fools like me
but only God can make a tree
-Joyce Kilmer-

Spring

Spring has finally arrived. Although it officially started in March, the weather didn't catch up until this weekend. Time to mow, plant, water, pull weeds clean gutters, wash windows and finally get to play some golf. The laundry can be hung out to dry. Nothing like sheets right off the clothesline. Love the smell. Too bad it only seems to last one night. Unless you want to wash sheets every day.

On the golf course. This area has had some great rains the past two weeks. The fairways are beautiful dark green. One batch of baby geese has hatched 8 in all. That will mean a lot of goose poop before they leave. Local rule is you get a free drop from a ball that finds the poop. Just don't lick it to clean it off. Use the ball washer.

A new golfer's aid has become popular. Anyone who watches any golf at all knows what a Sky Caddie is. It is a GPS device that measures distance to the cup. The golf course has to buy all new flag sticks with the chips in them. They are legal in tournaments, but only if they just show distance. Some higher priced devices show wind velocity and other factors. Now I know what I want for Christmas (it's too late for my birthday), as our course is going to get the sticks.

Remember golf is only a GAME. There are only 3 things to remember. Keep your head down. Keep you darn head down. Keep you gosh darn head down.

If it goes right it's a slice. If it goes left it's a hook. If it goes straight it's a miracle.